Light and Struggles of a Spiritual Journey

My own spiritual journey started when Garrett gifted me "The Secret" by Rhonda Byrne for Christmas, and to be honest, I wasn't thrilled about it. "C'mon now, you didn't look at my Audible wish list did you?" But, because he cared about me and felt so strongly for me to read it, I took a chance and cracked it open. Before I even finished the first chapter, I was hooked. The powerful knowledge that was resting on the pages drew me to a magnificent new way of thinking and a new path opened up. I began to use manifest, Co-Create and have faith in the wonders of what The Universe has to offer me. I have been enjoying the light, and working through the shadows for about a year and a half now. Learning and discovering new things literally each and every day. Recently I was going through another lower part of my journey. Dealing with shadow work was getting to me. I was video chatting with my cousin, Heather, about how I was feeling. She is one of the few people I can completely open myself too and it is received and reciprocated. She helped me through this Lil rough patch, and this is the allegory of the patch-work we did and the continuation of thread that followed.

"You are the one who calls the law of attraction into action, and you do it through your thoughts. " -Rhonda Byrnes, The Secret

Beginning a spiritual journey is like purchasing an old house, that has sat vacant for a while. You have no idea what you're truly getting yourself into, but you know it is going to be life-changing. You beam as you walk through the hefty wooden front door that hasn't been opened in who knows how long. You start to open up all windows, shining in a new light and letting in the fresh air. You dust and sweep the original hardwood and begin to spruce things up. With the unpacking going smooth, you're feeling great. You're on a roll. You're excited about what's to come!

Later that evening, after hours of easy unpacking and giddy feelings, you go to grab a well-deserved shower. To your shock and disappointment... there is no hot water. Confused and disappointed, you wash up in the sink and decide tomorrow you'll check it out. Tomorrow comes, and it turns out there's a leak in the gas pipes. "I've got this." You think. This has to be taken care of so, you set out to fix it. Sounds easy enough until you realize its a 6-hour job crawling on your belly through the mud and muck under the house to replace the pipes. You throw on your oldest gnarliest outfit and start crawling. Praying no crazy raccoons or creatures from the deep come to get you! You face those deep dark fears. Once the pipes are all replaced you're so relieved! So proud! Like, "YEAH, look at me go fixing stuff up in here! I'm the boss of this house!"

The house lightly chuckled," Oh darling, we're not finished yet." Triumphantly you turn on the gas, and unfortunately, it just won't hold its pressure. You check the appliances and discover the water heater has a leak in it. You dig through the half-unpacked boxes with determination and find your tools. Wrench in hand, you set out to fix that too. Fixing this turned out to be easier than the last one, just replacing a rusty hose! You feel SO accomplished and happy that you didn't let this little bump in the road stop you from a steaming hot SHOWAAAH!

You prepare yourself that evening for the best shower ever. You get a new loofah and whip out the best soap and towels you own! You drink your favorite wine and get your relaxing playlist ready to go. As you turn on the faucet...nothing. No water comes out. Not even a drop. Standing there stark naked, the house laughs at you. "It's ok" you whisper while wiping away a tear, "I'll try again tomorrow."

The next day, you wake up determined to fix this. You haven't had a hot shower in over a week. Don't even look over at the dishes piling up because of all of this. You go to the bathroom and look at the shower nozzle with ferocity. What is it!? Is the faucet handle old and stripped? So you twist it off and quickly realize, that's not the issue. As you replace the handle, you think about another idea. You dig deep, and your intuition strikes. "The panel" it whispers to you. That's right! You take a peek around the shower and there's the wooden panel that gives access under the tub. You run back to your toolset, grab a hammer and pry that baby open. In doing so, you unveil that there is a singular blue knob, covered in spider webs. The nails from the panel are protruding out at you as you reach your hand in. You feel the cold draft coming from under the house and have flashbacks to the pipe repair.

Reaching out, you twist lefty-loosey like your daddy taught ya. You hold your breath. Yet nothing happens. But something inside of you says "Go check." You begrudgingly stick your hand in and grab the hot water handle and give it a go.

You hear a rumbling in the pipes. You're staring in optimistic disbelief, "Is this really happening?!" Then, as natural as it should, the cascades of hot water begin to fall. You feel the steam on your hand and can't help but burst into tears and a happy dance!! "I DID IT!!! I FIXED IT!!! AHHH!!" You run and show your significant other, "baby, I did it!" They hug you because they're so proud of you, and rejoice because now they too get to enjoy a shower!

With zero hesitation, you collect your essentials and jump in! This is what you've been waiting for! You get to finally wash your greased up hair, smell like a freshly sprung field of flowers, and soak in the steam. You've never appreciated getting to wash your toes like this before! Everything feels like an Egyptian goddess had ordered it personally. You are just so grateful for this shower, that all of your hard work lead to this moment.

The hard work and triumphs that you went through, is what it's like to go on a spiritual journey. You walk on this new path, just as you walked alongside Jesus, God, or The Universe through that front door together. You open up the windows side by side. They held the dustpan for you as you sweep. They were with you in the darkness under the house, guarding you against the raccoons so you never had to see them. They guided you to remember where in your slew of boxes your wrench is. They were there next to you, supporting you as you troubleshoot the janky faucet handle. They whispered, "The Panel" and you followed. They knew, that you could do it. They were with you the entire time, supporting you, loving you, cheering you on.

They want nothing more for you than to have a hot shower and have it every single day.

Life is full of ups and downs, as cliche as that sounds. Your personal spiritual journey will be filled with happy, easy, sad, difficult, tearful, fearful, and powerful moments. It is up to you to keep choosing to rise up and overcome. Keep persevering because once you have discovered yourself on this path, there is no returning to life previous to this. How could you? When you know that there is this powerful and beautiful world right at your fingertips.

"Obstacles do not block the path,they are the path.” — Zen Proverb.

You may not get that job or that friend may blow you off. You may struggle with the why. But for whatever reason, your plans changed, rejoice over that "missed opportunity", because it was not the right one intended for you. You have a plan in your life far more amazing than anything you could plan yourself. So just know that you are being guided on this path that will lead you to your true happiness and purpose. :)

I wanted to say thank you, to all who continue to support me and love me. I took a different route this time. I wanted to share this story with you because this truly happened to us when we got this home. We waited for weeks for our gas to be fixed, which affected the water heater and the furnace. A trying time it was. We even rented an Airbnb in our neighborhood for a few nights just to take a shower. But the things that came out of that time, will be invaluable to me for the rest of my days. I learned to be grateful for a warm home, for washing my toes, for the ability to wash my dishes without boiling water to fill the sink. For Garrett and our bond that strengthened because of this hardship that we shared together. And the best thing that came out of this situation, was a beautiful new friendship. The hosts of the Airbnb were some of the kindest people we have met. They shared so many interests, and we just connected on multiple levels. Now, Lin and I have weekly social distancing coffee and Monday night Zoom book club. She is so wise, supportive, and loving. She is a true definition of a great neighbor, a great woman, and best of all, a friend.

See you all again soon,



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